nobody has any suggestions?

Hehe, congrats on getting to this stage! I had similar issues when I first gained control in lucid dreams, and have had them again more recently as I stopped smoking pot and started lucid dreaming again (it's a "use it or lose it" kind of skill with me). My mind has the tendency to either wake up or get carried off back in non-lucid dreaming.

I'd highly recommend practicing meditation. . .learning to calm the mind is crucial when you notice yourself waking up.

When waking out of a dream, usually the dreamscape will descend beneath me as I rise into wakefulness, so staring at and focusing on any item in the dream (a doorknob, a fountain, an animal, whatever) helps me to stay grounded and focus my mind. Even if the dreamscape completely disappears and I find myself in the hypnogogic phase (I usually don't completely wake up when rolling over during the night) I can sometimes continue to hold the after-image of the object I was focusing on in my mind, and as I descend back into dream, I can continue where I left off. If I actually make it back to the dreamscape after waking up, I don't have many issues the rest of the night.

Good luck!

Hi Rachael,

It's kind of a paradox, because lucid dreaming is one of the most exciting things that can happen to you, yet the way to keep lucidity once you've got it is to not get too excited, and just be really calm like "oh, I'm lucid... hmm, that's nice..." My problem lately is that my FREQUENCY of lucid dreams is dissapointingly low (one of the cardinal rules of learning lucid dreaming skills, unfortunately, is you have to get a lucid dream to begin with... which of course is preceded by the simple law of nature that you have to be GETTING SLEEP in the first place, lol!)-- and I am so focused on rewiring my sleep patterns to accomodate a future job schedule that I cannot prioritize lucid dreaming right now. Once I DO get to the lucid state, though, I'm pretty good at handling it, and when I do, I find the key EVERY SINGLE TIME is to not let yourself get too excited, and not make any effort to make anything in particular happen. This is extremely important... if you want to eat or have sex, or fly, or whatever... then sorry, but as a lucid dreaming beginner, you're really going to succeed much more if you just grin and bear whatever your subconscious throws at you--make the most of it, and see what you can learn from it. You wanted a hint... that is THE hint. When you have the amount of control it takes to choose what you get to experience, you will know. (and in that case, I will still warn you--if you want to increase your chances of not waking up--to somewhat work within the ranges of whatever is going on in your dream. Making a sexual encounter happen is particularly difficult if it is not already naturally part of the dream)

I'm new here, btw, nice to meet all you fellow oneironauts! :-)

Wow so many great suggestions! I'm looking forward to trying them all. Last night I tried focusing on an object but it was more like frantic grasping about as I felt myself being pulled out of dreaming, and couldn't find anything to focus on. I'll have to try that one again, sans franticness...

i'm just starting to get back into trying to lucid dream - had some success - here's my suggestions - which are a bunch of don'ts
:-)

don't try and read anything - the words will usually change and you'll lose focus
don't stare in a mirror - it will pull your awareness away
don't try and fulfill some desire - you'll probably be tempted by stuff
don't stop moving, but don't try too hard to go someplace
if the scene changes, or starts to fade out - that does not mean you have to wake up! this just happened to me and it was amazing - i thought i was going to wake up but i was able to hang on to my awareness and the scene shifted into something else
you may be flying but not controlling where you are going - you have to remind yourself that you can pass through walls, etc so you dont close your eyes

i think some dreams are just your mind working stuff out. but i also believe that some "dreams" are - im not sure if astral travel is the right word - basically that there are lots of different "realities" that can be shared with other people. these "dreams" are much more vivid and the experience is deeper. so with that said - don't assume that the other person in your dream is experiencing what you are. like maybe it looks like a pine forest to you - the other person might be experiencing an office building. same for what they look like, and what you think you look like to them.

do - repeat something to yourself - a mantra or some phrase like 'i'm in a dream'
do - if you wake up in the middle of the night or whatever - repeat the phrase as you go back to sleep to create the intention
do - have some mornings when you can really sleep in. i seem to lucid dream much easier when i should be awake!

What has worked for me goes along the lines of what has been suggested above about focusing or staring at something in the visual field.

It doesn't always happen perfectly, of course. What i think needs to happen is, as you've said, for you to stop thinking about that you're dreaming. But in a certain way. The wrong way pulls your concentration from your dream experience. It seems there is an 'easier' way of being aware you're dreaming. ???

Anyway, as you are starting to realize you're dreamng and kind of losing it, or being in that mid zone, latch on any single visual thing. There are always images flashng through the mind, it seems, especially in this dream or near dream state. In a meditative state you can just watch them change, sometimes very rapidly, sometimes less so. I find being able single out one simple article, even something i might dredge up from memory, like the face of a friend, and then just look at it clearly the object will become lucidly detailed and i will ease into whatever scene it belongs to.

Sorry if that seems like a mix of ideas. I mean mainly some object that you notice in your dream scene. Sometimes all these ideas mix, however. You just need to go with what's there at that moment, and use it.

This is real general and attempts at this are a constant experimental thing, with hits and misses.

Probably focusing on any sensory aspect of what is happening in the constant parade of your subconscious will work. I've been pulled back in by realizing there are voices talking or music playing, and then just listening focusedly on that.

And, as Buck suggests, sleep in through the morning when you can, waking up and going back to sleep often. Great time to practice the in and out of dream thing.